A Note From Someone Who Loves Your Soul

Of course I share the same fear as you do, just not to the same degree. I don't fear losing you because I know I'll do anything I need to in order to keep you, because I believe when two people genuinely love each other nothing can separate them. You need to let go of that fear, you need to because without letting it go it will harm our relationship. Nothing is more detrimental to a relationship than each person trying to secure themselves, protect themselves, from feeling they need the other person. That's what love is, I need you, of course I could function without you but my quality of life wouldn't compare. If you let that fear effect you, it's a self fulfilling prophecy and we won't end up together. That's the risk you have to take, a risk you have to accept in order to achieve something amazing: genuine love. We've both had experiences that rattled us as individuals, that caused us to question ourselves; but that is why we are special, because that won't ever happen again, not on my watch. Please don't forget you do as much for me as I do for you; you see a confident, fun loving, easy going , motivated guy because you allowed me to feel that way again. When I was in high school, as a sophomore and junior, my teammates and coaches constantly referred to me as "fearless". I was never intimidated by anyone, I would never back down, and my teammates knew it. That's a mindset I've taken with me, I try to be fearless; it's based in a fundamental belief in myself, on a belief that everything will workout at the end of the day. For the first time in my life, this year, I lost that mentality; I was scared, I questioned myself. When I met you, I knew how much chemistry we had, I knew how special you were; but I also knew I had that fear in the back of my mind. Being around you allowed me yo return to my natural state, in my natural state I am fearless, because I only see potential, I only see success. What allows me to be so fearless is my ability to ignore the things most people fear, unlike you I don't think about how things could go wrong or how a decision could cost me dearly; I only see success, I only see it all working out. I see things this way because I believe in myself, I believe we're meant to be together, and I believe we can overcome anything together. For a while, I think you sensed that fear in me and you responded by restraining your feelings. There is no room for fear, no room for considering failure; I love you, I believe in us. Once again, I'm fearless because I know I won't lose you, I know I won't. You need to reframe fear in your mind, stop fearing getting hurt, start fearing what you'll miss out on if you let a fear of being hurt affect you. That's why it bothers me when you always say I should think about us and let you know when we argue: that's clear cut fear. You're sitting there waiting for something to go wrong, waiting to get hurt: you need to recognize your agency in life YOU HAVE CONTROL. When you think, "oh no we're going to break up", I think "hell no, I won't let this happen". I would rather overestimate my control over life than live in fear, I would rather live fearlessly and be wrong than live in fear. Part of this is because of my ex girlfriend, partly because you have always felt I'm not 100% yours. You need to have more confidence in yourself; how could I possibly want anyone but you. WE are the best couple I've ever seen, certainly the best I've been a part of. You make me laugh like no one ever has, you let me be my normal weird self, you love me the way I love you, you share similar values to me, you are the coolest girl ever, you make me want to succeed, YOU. I love YOU, I love you for the person you are, I love you for how you make me feel, I love you for the chemistry we have, I love you. I suppose it will just take time, but at some point you'll realize/accept how much I love you. I fully EXPECT to marry you, I expect to spend the rest of my life with you, and I expect to be the happiest person in the world because of it. I always say I fear losing you but I really don't because I have blind faith that we are meant to be together, that we will be together: that is love.